"going to the edge and back, one word at a time."
I carve the midnight wax.I sit in a dimly lit room and slice the sticky surface,flossed paper thin,a millimeter from being invisible,and study the premeditated etch with tired eyes,the lines becoming more defined as it cools. I feel like a master sculptor who pretends to be a nobody.I push the heated wax just enoughthen release …
I would go to bed the night before and be thinking about it,and I would dream about it and the master plan at hand and in my make believe fantasy that I thought I personally controlled something would still go wrong,and I thought I had exited out my strategy and un-looped all my loopholes and …
It's so lonely nowadays...isn't it?.....looking at things by yourself...looking at yourself by yourself...while you hold it in your hand and run your finger over it... ...eyes spying...staring...poking...prodding......as you lay on your couches...in your underwear...on your beds...in your car...while you sit idle at work...or hunched over on your kneecaps while sitting on the toilet......naked...exposed...bare......that something catches …
Day 1 Daddy, it's been one day since you died, and I miss you now more than ever. You used to live six minutes from me on a backroad drive through the countryside and now you are nowhere to be found, a futile manhunt that will never end until we reunite again one day. I …
You do not have time anymore. Time has us. The master of thieves. ... If you want to see the ocean, go see it. If you want to see a live band, go to that concert. If there is a dream you want to chase, go and try to manifest it. If you want to …
I tried running away. Seriously. I did. But she still found me. She looked for me just as much as I tried to hide from her, whether it was in my dreams or while living in the unusual decay of a forgotten town I once knew and felt safe in when I was younger or …
I once knew a little boy that was so full of life... he was never scared... he thought the world was safe... he ate Fruity Pebbles and watched old school Looney Tunes... he actually looked forward to the humid summertime heat... he had endless energy... he avoided work at all costs... he rode bicycles on …
HeY, YoU, long time no talk, how are YoU holding up? ... Are YoU doing okay? I've really, really missed YoU... ... like, REALLY, REALLY... not just reaLLy reaLLy... What?.. ... Things been tough lately? ... Somewhat chaotic? ... Somewhat out of place? ... Somewhat abnormal? ...yeah... I know how YoU feel... ... It feels …
* if it is hard for you to take a break from our current reality and listen to an open minded opinion of what a single soul sees and feels and reflects on in his present parallel, then this post is definitely NOT for you. Let's begin... (also, it is good to be back with …
On my nightstand, my cell phone alarm echosbefore the first peaking crumb of morning sunlight -I smell coffee laced air after a long restless nightand stumble down the foggy hall of a work week’s shadow.-Endless road...Drive...More endless...Drive...Lines on asphalt, road signs,..Drive...turn signals, cruise control...-I brush my teeth, urinate, and quietly beholdas I hesitantly sit atop …
Wow! What an adventure the past couple of years has been for all of us. I hope my writings have entertained you or provoked a different way of thinking, whether you have read one of my samples from time to time or all of them as they slowly filtered through the cracks of every day …
I looked into Santa's eyes while he looked into my son's,and,the glimmer was differentthan what I rememberwhen I was young.In awe,my son looked at the red velveted manthat all money bearing parents rally behindandforce the little ones to watch on screensand push the little ones to believe -a myth of hopeandgoodwill to submerge ourselves into …
Could, Would, or Should You... Kiss on a first date,Smile at a turn-on,Make the first move,Be the first one to call or text, - (it was at this point in the blog that the writer decided to go off kilter because he was simply tired of the mundane, ordinary thoughts and wanted to wander outside …
Something is coming, whether it be through a cold winter's door, sloshing through the trough of puddled rain, across the brittle rustle of dying leaves, a medieval entity that has comfortably slept through the humidity of our restless summer nights, inside all of our aging sarcophagus', until now. Something is coming, and I feel the …
( apply what you want - negate the rest )___________________________I'm thankful I have myself.I’m thankful that I take up more, now, for my own mental health and self esteem than I did in my twenties. I'm thankful I did not give up when the many occasions presented itself for me to do so.I'm thankful to …
Have you ever looked forward to something in life, like anticipated it with every fiber of your being, and it did not pan out like you imagined it would? How much time did you spend running that scenario through your head? How much energy did you give your 'perfect planned sequence of events'? How disappointed …
I was sitting there, alone, on my perch...like a full bellied pigeon on a freshly washed car -like a stray shopping cart in an open parking spot -like fresh crumbs on a newly wiped table -as curious as a toddler to an open electrical socket -as oblivious as an oxygen filled balloon -as vulnerable as …
A tear that is wiped away - is it less important than one that falls? My friend once told me, "the only time I am happy is when I'm asleep," and every time I readjust my rearview mirror and see myself, or stare at my reflection as I shave my face, or gaze at my …
in an open field, alone, constantly chewing, always standing, sometimes laying, through the wind and rain, on frost covered ground, in the middle of summer's fury, with each passing season, old lonely cow waits, unknowingly patient, for the day when her sculptured grazing silhouette transitions from farmer's field to carnivore's plate. some people will say …
Inside Out - a story about a female ghost who finds herself torn between her current realm and the place where her twin flame resides. Will her memories keep her connected to him or will she abandon all hope of being able to touch him again while slowly losing herself in the grey? A girl …
Hey,you knew this day was going to come and it sucks to have to sit here and type the things you are about to have to read and dissect and reflect on for the millionth time in your life.It gets old - I know. You expected this type of unselfish gloating from your inner being …
The first couple sips of coffee in the early hours of the morning workweek, ... I want this moment. When my breathe touches the outside air in the coldness of winter and I can see my soul with each exhale. The crunch I hear as I tread upon the trees' shedded clothes, the fallen leaves …
The fifth post I published (#5 out of 87) on this now one year and eight month fiction, nonfiction, and poetic blogging journey of mine was titled The Aged and the Ageless (feel free to click and read). It was posted a couple of months before Covid became a global issue. Since then, as well as …
Why is a good decision hard to make? Tell me, please! Or is it not really that difficult and my mind is just playing tricks on me yet again? On the other hand, why does it seem like a bad decision is so easy to make? I try to think if there was ever a …
Where do I begin? I mean, seriously... ... I saw the beautiful shell of my deceased Aunt lying in a casket today, and it has me pondering. Thinking. Reflecting on the many reflections I see, a never ending epiphany considering this birthday is the one that determines a lot of things about where I see …
...the silence.........the instancewhen we acceptthe precipice.........the momentwe enterthe void.........where ? can we go toabsorb it,together?...where ? can we go to taste it,together?...where ?can we go tobe one with it,together?......where is the "the"?.....The silence stays with meuntil it is tired of meor maybe this feelingof morose issuppose to last longerthan I think it is.........wait!..shh!...Can you hear …
Over the past four months, I have been diligently working on the sequel to my first short film. I lost three weeks of editing and promotion time due to a work related accident (click to read previous post titled “Don’t Look Down” : an unfortunate allegory") and had to postpone the release. Now, here we are, …
Continue reading "My Second Short Film Trailer + Delayed Premiere"
- THIS POST CONTAINS GRAPHIC INJURY PICTURES - - VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED - Let the longest week of my life begin... Thank you for being here... My story within a story. Thursday, March 24th, 2022 - 6:30 a.m. I had arrived at work on time and was looking to start a productive day. Things …
Continue reading "“Don’t Look Down” : an unfortunate allegory"
"Babe?" She rolls over and faces him after her question. "Yeah?" He rolls over onto his side and faces her after he answers her question. "What do you see when you look at me?" He grins at her. She smiles back. They exchange blinks. Both of them had been waiting all week to create a …
I'm going to start out by saying, "if this post offends you - good!" If this post does not offend you, then I say, "Great! Even better!" Right now, at this present moment, some of you are finding yourself at a crossroad. You are reading the scrolling newsfeeds and witnessing miraculous events combined with the …
This blog post is complete and utter chaos. Consider yourself warned. Let's begin! I know everything about nothing and not a thing about something! My job is not important if I make it that way. You know what? You whine more than a whine's whine. My neck is tired. From looking down. At the television. …
The cold winter rain falls. I hear the trickles leaping off my roof like a liquid metronome whose precise timing is occasionally off-beat. The sound is like an ice bath to my ears. I wrap myself in my blanket and try to warm everything that is trapped underneath it. I burrow my body into the …
I am truly blessed, regardless of current events, regardless of my bank account, regardless of the weather, regardless of regardless. I am happy, regardless of my mistakes, regardless of my past, regardless of my overcomplicating things, regardless of regardless. What are you, regardless of regardless? You can get sad, regardless of your joy, regardless of …
I feel like ...something... is in the air ...and... I do not mean the ...something... that currently haunts ...us... Some would say it was ...nothing..., others ...something..., ...and... I'm left thinking if ...something... ...or... ...nothing... for them is the same ...something... ...or... ...nothing... for me ...and... truth be told, it's ...not... ...Everything... quietly depends on …
Upside Down - a fictional story about a guy who finds himself torn between the present time and past memories of a deceased lover. Will her memories keep him from the point of no return? She can only hope so. I give to you my first short film. A fictional script of heartfelt words spoken …
Wow! What a month it has been so far! What am I saying? What a year it has been so far - sheesh! I premiered my first short film two weeks ago and, even now, it seems like an eternity. Time is a tricky entity. Friends and family, as well as a good number of …
I have always admired good direction, writing, and cinematography when it comes to movies. Even while studying certain directors and writers, whether they are established, discovering themselves, or brand new, I feel like visual art can touch the viewer in many ways and leave a long lasting impression. Anyone can put words or paint on …
My readers, how I have missed you over the course of the past month! People occasionally ask me 'what is writing to you', and I find myself sticking to the same analogy, a descriptive analysis that I will probably attach myself to until I am no more. Writing, to me, is compared to that first …
Remember when you scraped your knee as a kid? Hit the 'not so funny' bone on your elbow as an adolescent? Delivered a paper cut to your finger as an adult? Had your heart broken, like blind sided shattered, not the type of break when you keep taking back the same waste of time that …
(...shh!.. wait!.. be quiet!.. I think someone, or something, is outside my door! I think I hear them plotting against me, yet again... they're here!.. I knew it!.. I knew they would be back one day...) They're onto me. Let me type this really fast before I disappear. Pass it along in ways that you …
I sat on her couch. She handed me a pill. I watched her swallow hers before I swallowed mine. She dimmed the lights in her living room and lit a couple of candles. She put on a Rufus Du Sol playlist. I watched every movement she made with great intrigue. I rubbed the tops of …
(a making-out-with-life experience) Does a cactus in the desert worry about rain? Can you miss something that you have never seen or someone you have never met? Have you ever seen a starving buzzard not capable of flying high in the sky? Are you burning your candle at both ends or does one wick suffice …
Creative ways to die in the twenty first century, if you are looking for a more artistic way to go - Death by Sex (great band name as well too), Obit reads, "He Gave Life Everything He Had and Enjoyed the Ride!" Death by Eating Ice Cream, Obit reads, "Man Dies With A Spoon in …
Are you scared to read me? To undress me with your e y e s with each word your brain scans, slowly pinching your f i numb g e r in between your t e electric t h, kneecaps clinched but h e always r t open? . (Life gets harder - the up,) (down, …
This post is for the people who are on the down and outs. The discouraged. The dreamers. The blue collar backbone of our beaten world. The people who have nowhere else to turn to. The people who have three figures or less in their savings account, much less checking. The people who see more light …
My right knee caps been hurtin all duh time now,and I’ve had a sore throat fer almost two months.Sum days, I have trouble jus gittin off duh floor.I have tuh roll round like an upside down bug.I have tuh crawl on dem knuckles o’ mine.I have tuh make dem old man sounds.I wanna git my …
I remember her and I know she remembers me and we will continue to do so forever. There is no other way for us to live. I could try to forget her or her me, but I know I will fail so what am I to do except breathe and curse the air that continues …
Is this where I have to run so I can be completely honest with myself? Do I have to fluff my three pillows and down comforter and lay my body between the world and the unwashed sheets of the paper bed that I call my journal? Is this where I can sincerely share my thoughts …
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